I Say Tomehto You Say Tomahto

Dear Gentle Reader,

As I close in on nearly 20 years as a resident (and now citizen) of the great United States of America, I am musing on the linguistic differences between American English and that spoken back in the Old Country, England.

For example, the old song "I Say Tomehto and You Say Tomahto; I Say Potehto and You Say Potarto"..comes to mind.

If you say to someone "I am going back to bed for a bit," your friend who speaks American English may inquire "for a bit of what?" whereas the friend who speaks the Queen's English, or some derivative thereof, would understand the expression as meaning "I going back to bed to sleep for a while." So I would advise substituting the word "bit" for "a while."

We've all heard how to avoid the embarrassment of asking your American tennis-playing friend for a "knock up", by substituting the question "shall we hit a few balls before we start scoring games?" The very idea of having a knock up, that is sex, on a tennis court in full view of the public likely may be a deterrent for all but the most brazen of us.

A vest in American English is a waistcoat in English. Suspenders keep your pants up in American English, whereas they keep a woman's hose up in England. Pants are trousers in American English, but are underpants in English English.

And so on.

While comparing England to America, someone (was it George Bernard Shaw?) said something about..."two great peoples divided by a common language."

How true.

My point here is that English, whether spoken in Oxford or in Philadelphia for example, can be a wonderfully facile tongue and is open to many interpretations.

In this global age English is widely spoken. A friend who teaches English and who has taught in China and plans to teach in Japan says that English for a non-speaker is one of THE most difficult languages to learn. What makes it so flexible and open to interpretation and nuance, also makes it harder.

So if the English spoken by an educated Brit differs so much from that spoken by an educated American, imagine the miscommunications that can ensue when slang and colloquialisms are introduced into the equation.

Cheers

Osama Bin Laden

Oh Osama Bin Laden
Where U Bin a ‘hidin?
In them tha’r hills
Since you went for the kill(s)

You thought you had u.s. licked
When you bombed out those sticks
That towered above us
In the Land of the Free!

But that was 10 years ago
And who was to know?
That we’d soon track you down
And put you (6 feet) in the ground

You shook u.s. like dust
Back in ‘ole Tora Bora
But you always knew
That night leads to a ‘morrow;
And that one of these days
You’d be caught in a haze
Of bullets and sorrow

There is an old adage,
I’ve heard tell
That if you live by the sword,
You might go to Hell;
I trust that your life
Was pleasantly spent
Blowing up people
‘Til your energy went;

And now that you’ve gone,
We’ll all carry on
In happier ways
Now the ‘battle’ is won

Goodbye!

Why Doctors are Bad for Your Health - Part III

Well, apparently President Obama agrees!

Agrees with what? you ask.

That doctors, or rather hospitals, CAN be bad for your health!

'One recent study published in the journal Health Affairs estimated that 1 in 3 hospital patients experienced an "adverse event" such as being given the wrong medication, acquiring an infection or receiving the wrong surgical procedure." (McClatchy News Service).

On April 29,2011, the president took an important step toward rectifying this endemic quality of health care issue when he finalized plans to reward hospitals that provide high quality health care. These steps are a by-product of the new health care reform act the president signed into law last year.

In other words, hospitals that reduce that 1-in-3 ratio of mistakes and inappropriate treatment will receive more money from Medicare than those institutions that continue to misdiagnose and fail to take adequate precautions against secondary infections such as Staph and others

We all know of people have gone into hospital for a surgical procedure only to contract pneumonia or some viral infection that delays and complicates recovery from that surgery.

The hope is by hitting hospitals where it hurts, that is in the pocket-book, the Obama administration will gain traction in a bid to improve the quality of health care without sacrificing the many benefits that Medicare confers on Americans.

Why Doctors are Bad for Your Health - Part II

In my last Blog I noted that an 85-year family friend, who has since died, saw very little of doctors during his life on Earth. Maybe he'll meet a few in Heaven. Until he suffered a massive stroke earlier this year, it was thought that he had not been to a doctor since he was in the Service during World War II. Not strictly accurate, I am told; but not too far from the truth. Once, aged 45 or so, he voluntarily visited a doctor, for something specific. About 10 years ago he broke his wrist - so there was a doctor involved for that. Doctors wanted to operate on the wrist to repair it, but he said NO. And not on religious grounds.

Until well into the twentieth century medicine was such that a visit to a doctor was best avoided.

It had been worse in the 19th Century, as military campaigns suffered huge casualties due to disease. Soldiers suffered at the hands of surgeons who, in many cases, were little more than meat butchers. During the American Civil War more soldiers died of disease than perished in battle, despite the terrible slaughter at battles such as Antietam and Gettysburg.

So are doctors bad for your health? I don't necessarily believe it, but I have many reasons to avoid hospitals and hospitalization.

Not least because I could come out missing the wrong limb, or be misdiagnosed with a terminal illness. But what scares me also about hospitals is the fear that I could go in for some minor procedure; and nearly die from a staph infection, as happened to my wife's aunt a few years ago.

Doctors are human beings who can take on a God-like status: which ill-fits them. May be it is a power thing: you know being able to dispense life and death. We all know good, kind and capable doctors. We also know doctors who are arrogant, teacher-knows-best types, with lousy bedside manners. Competence may excuse a bad bedside manner; but only rarely. After all, a patient should be treated as a human being by members of the Caring Profession.

A Code of Silence

Here is what bothers me about doctors collectively. Their code of silence. They back each other to the hilt, when they shouldn't.

Take the case of Dr. Kermit Gosnell, the Philadelphia back street abortionist, whose butchery and ineptitude practiced on desperate women, was covered up by the very doctors who had to sort out his surgical mess. Doctors at the University of Pennsylvania Health System, which operates two hospitals within a mile of Gosnell's clinic in West Philadelphia, saw at least six of those patients - two of whom died.

But, according to a report by the Associated Press, 'they largely failed in their legal and ethical duties to report their peer's incompetence." Much in the same way that certain Roman Catholic bishops colluded with pedophile priests under their jurisdiction, which, as a Catholic, leaves a horrid, bitter taste in my mouth.

"Why did these doctors who treated these women fail to report a fellow physician who was so obviously endangering his patients," wrote the Philadelphia grand jurors who, according to the same AP report, recommended a slew of charges against Gosnell and his staff.

Maybe the problems is specific to Philadelphia's health care system. My son, for one, had a very bad experience concerning psychiatric health care in the Philadelphia health care system. The source of this woeful tale is a registered psychiatrist who took a laissez-faire approach to monitoring my son's well being after prescribing him a powerful medication to treat his depression.

That hands-off attitude nearly proved fatal to my son. Judging from responses he and I have got from that trick cyclist, he apparently could care less about my son.

So maybe my family friend was on to something.

Why Doctors are Bad for Your Health!

A story comes to me about an 85-year old man recently hospitalized after a major stroke who had not visited a doctor since he was in military service in the Second World War! This U.S. Vet, it seems, had no time for doctors of any description, and was none too happy when the emergency services took him away on a gurney and put him into the hospital. Indeed he has been - to say the least - an uncooperative patient, pulling out all manner of wires, saline drips, and other medical paraphernalia intended to keep him alive.

What prompts this stubbornness, this wholesale rejection of the caring professions? Who know? He is not a Christian Scientist, a religion which I understand eschews medical intervention. Rather he is a practicing Roman Catholic whose church to the best of my knowledge encourages people to take care of themselves and seek medical attention if needed, and to protect and prolong life wherever possible.

Which leads me to another musing. Do regular trips to the doctor really help? Or can they harm you? Suppose you or I have always enjoyed robust health and been lucky enough not to seek out medical help, would it not be just as well to stay away from the doctor?

For all the life-saving advances in medical treatment and technology, are patients really better off than in the old days when a local physician visited them at home if they were really sick, or had a one person practice for the more able bodied?

Is the current tendency by some in the medical profession to over-treat, over-medicate and over proscribe a response to societal needs? Or is the proliferation of drug-company products and the concomitant advertising that promises enhanced quality of life, foisting on people drugs that may or may not work? Can the woesome litany of side-effects that follow each new ad for anti-depressants such as Cymbalta, or Abilify, arthritis pain reliever Vimovo, or sex-life enhancers Viagra or Citalis inspire confidence in a patient who as the ad says, should "ask your doctor" to prescribe bla, di, bla!

Was the octogerian stroke victim at the beginning of this article on to something when he sought to live his life free of doctor's visits?

Election Day 2010

What is so special about Election Day 2010 for me Patrick Kelly? This is the first opportunity in 17 years for me to vote as a resident of the United States. A chance to do my civic duty, one that many native born U.S. citizens take for granted or do not to exercise, I hear. I became a U.S. citizen in March 2009 at a simple ceremony in Fairfax Virginia. I can replicate that proud moment here in Maine where I have lived since June 2009. I am excited by the prospect of going to the polls to find out what happens inside the voting room, to produce my ID and to discover the mechanics of voting in the Land of the Free.

Now who shall I vote for? For Elliott Cutler or Libby Mitchell for Governor? GOC candidate Paul LePage is a non starter in my book. For Democrat Shelli Pingree or GOP candidate Dean Scontras for the U.S. House. Or for state Senate hopeful Joe Palmieri or his opponent, Democrat Larry Bliss, and in the state House Amy Fern Volk or Democrat incumbent Sean Flaherty?

Frankly, as a newcomer to Maine and as a first-timer at the voting booth, I feel it is less important for whom I vote; but more important that I exercise my right to vote

After all, for the better part of 16 years I was a "green card" holder who paid his taxes to Uncle Sam but who could not vote for those making decisions on how to spend my taxes.

Now didn't the issue of Taxation without Representation spark the American Revolution?

Ho Hum

Music Night at Higgins Beach

I had occasion to go to a concert Tuesday night at the Higgins Beach community center and saw a jazz trio hosted by Tony Boffa - he is a fine guitarist and a warm and funny speaker.

For some inexplicable reason, my mind went back to the winter of 1980 and to the Fulmer Village Hall, England, where a friend of mine, Martin and his band were "strutting their stuff" before an audience of high rollers from the Gerrards Cross and Fulmer areas. The occasion was Karen and my UK wedding reception and the band up on stage was playing all sorts of rock-n-roll - I also remember the band's performance being, in a sense, controversial. Appreciation for Martin and his chum's musical abilities and choice of material they played divided the audience along generational fault lines. The "oldies" as represented by my parents and their friends found the music noisesome, whereas our friends thoroughly enjoyed themselves, so it seemed.

I cannot recall how many times a friend or other of my parents would sidle up to me among the guests saying: "Can't you get the band to turn the music down." Of course I would then have to pass on the message to Martin and his chums, knowing full well that there is only so much "turning down" that a live rock-n-roll band accustomed to full amplification, can do.

So the band played on!

After the food was eaten and the floor cleared for dancing, the older generation repaired to the Black Horse for a few scotches or whatever and some opportunity for chit chat in a more peaceful environment, and the kids (30 years and younger) danced to the bands loud music.

Meanwhile, 30 years later.....

Ah well twas ever thus! Tony Boffa played music from every era from the 40's, to Taylor Swift an American Idol winner and recording artiste. It was great. He was educated at the Berklee School of Music in Boston, Ma and has a fine appreciation for three or more part harmonies as practised by the likes of the Eagles, Beatles, Beach Boys, Zombies and others. He does not, it seems, care much for contemporary music and says that musicians these days are into writing and performing their own stuff only; whereas earlier generations of musical performers drew deeply from the well of songs from musicians gone by. He has a point.

Well that is it. I think I may start a blog of my adventures in Maine. Karen and I are having a wonderful time up here - when we are not working that is!